Tourist citizens

By Malebo Gololo

I am not one to harp on or rather show the "race" card as it has become a way of escapism for many people, but the reality is, right here in South Afrika, a country where racial reconciliation is supposed to be a model to the global community, a country where all races are supposed smile together and cry unity - we are more racially divided than we would like to admit and I was hit by this truth yesterday ( 12/10/2013).

I love participating in these leisure races organised by different brands.  Amongst my favourites is the Nike #werunJozi 10 km run held 12/10/2013.  What I have come to notice about these races is that they are supported by whites and one would swear that whites were in the majority if you were to go by these races.  I mean these runs are promoting health and fun times, we cannot say that this is a "white activity"; but the fact that we have a certain activity supported mostly by one racial group, really indicates how separated we are.  We are just in denial about it and it is this denial stage that will cause a serious erupt of emotions between the different race groups of South Afrika.

It reminds me of the international arrival terminal at the OR Thambo International Airport - you will think that this is a white state.  Every sunday, Afrikan people flock to different churches, some to all-Afrikan churches and a handful to white led churches (where the culture in the church is pretty much white) - there is one particular church that seems to have a balance of white and Afrikan individuals but is led by a white pastor, now I dare not ask if a Afrikan pastor would take over, if the white congregants would remain members?

We ran through Johannesburg CBD and for the greater part of the white participants, this was their first encounter with "town" and it felt as if they were tourists. I overheard some being in awe of how beautiful this city is and how they thought it would be dodgy; now I ask, what informed that pre-judgement? A specific incident was when we ran past Park Station, one gentleman asked "where is parkstation?" his friend responded "its on our left" and then in shock he responded: "Oh wow, I didn't expect it to be so clean and tidy" - I do not want to assume what he meant by that statement.  In one particular instance, some person said "ewwww this is so dodge" I just had to respond and said "now imagine living in such a dodge place", and my favourite was when a couple was running next to each other, the lady said with fear in her voice "honey, please run behind me, I don't feel safe" - I really had to contain myself and focus on my finish line.  I do not think me retaliating will solve the problem.  This post is to ask, what is the solution, why is that its the Afrikan majority who have to meet the white minority half way but they are not even willing to meet the Afrikans half way?  When will we realise that apartheid did more harm than we would like to acknowledge and "forgiveness" without dealing with the issue can only mean bad news.

Diaries of a Bothered bunch

By Malebo Gololo

My grandfather always told me that if there are things that bother me in society, therein lies a part of my calling.  My grandfather was a really smart and wise man and I miss him so much especially when I get stuck and my logic fails me.  I recently posed a question on my Facebook account about what bothers people- if my grandfather's statement is anything to go by, then I know we have a huge task ahead of us as a society
 So many things bother us but what are we to do about them?

People who like to romanticise life always say that one shouldn't complain; well, I support that school of thought, but I also feel complaining has its own space, the only issue I have is if one complains without intent to do something about that which one complains about.  Below is a few thought patters of what some people are bothered about:

What bothers me

*Seeing people living as slaves
*Racial/tribal/class supremacy
*Lack of education (formal/informal)
*Lack of mentorship
*Lack of attention as far as male teens are concerned
*People allowing their emotional distresses to occupy their lives
*People who behave line enos - one day ok, the next day down...


What bothers a Young Lady in her late 20's working in the corporate sector

"I  am really bothered by people who cant get round to living their lives, they spend all their time obsessing and talking about other people while life passes them by."

"I am bothered by the crappy service i get from waiters in restaurants or how the office maid wont clean my trash out or make my bed but she does it without complaining when its a white person living there and she gets paid the same at the end of the day. 

I am bothered by the fact that i have to work twice as hard to prove myself, just because i am a black woman, i can do the same amount of work as any white counterpart but they  have double the expense budget i have and its documented in HR policy."

"I am bothered that many black people who become successful after climbing the corporate ladder burn it behind them that others will not be able to reach where they are. They do not open the door or create opportunities for others to also make it, in my previous job my biggest persecutor was a black man who couldn't not stand my success and to see anyone come close to achieving what he had achieved, sad really. A black person does not want the success of another black person, why cant we uplift each other instead, support each other, surely we can achieve more that way even if it means someone will shine brighter than you, the common good is that as a collective we will move forward."

What bothers a Young Lady in her early 30's working in a male dominated industry

Over and above the stuff that bothers you Malebo, I'm also bothered by a black six year old who can't speak their mother tongue and the same parent is fascinated by a white two year old boy who can sing a national anthem. It bothers me that this little white boy, a south Afrikan, is being praised for knowing the words to HIS national anthem. He IS South Afrikan isn't he? Unless he's German or any other nationality, born and raised I honestly don't see what the spectacle is all about. 
 
I'm also bothered by a supremacist who seem to feel that black women in maritime are going to degrade their mariner's licenses as though they were worth sh*t in the first place. 
 
I'm bothered by a black car park attendant who won't help me, a black woman, carry my grocery bags to my car but expects my change for tip, and he does it for a white man. 
 
But most of all, I'm bothered by men with long finger nails, and long pinky nails (I'm going to throw up now)

What bothers a Young Lady in her mid 20's in Academia

 1. I am bothered by young people in the rural areas/townships, how they are being systematically starved of knowledge. I dunno where I would be if I hadn't grown around informative people who planted a seed of consuming knowledge that edifies me and opens my eyes to the world around me so that I can dream bigger. and it breaks my heart that the young people back home, are starved of that and so they don't dream bigger than the little that they know.

2. It breaks my heart that the definition of success, is settling down in cities. The standard of success is having the things white people have, So we leave our homes, townships and rural areas for the successful life in sandton and all the posh sandton facilities. Why is our success not manifesting where we come from? why is it that the more of us succeed and move to 'sandton', our townships and rural areas become more debilitated? our schools are drained of the best teachers who also want the successful life in JHB , the best public servants would rather serve in JHB than back home because their success would best be reflected by where they live and hang out..sandton etc . I've made a decision, I'm going back home soon....

3. I am bothered by the struggles of women at home , in relationships, raising children in this society where most men don't bring the bacon but bring negative and hostile environment that make it difficult and pain for women, and yet they must still do it, raise kids, be good wives, employees, girlfriends, ETC in spite of their brokenness MOSTLY in the hands of men who are supposed to be protectors and providers yet they do the extreme opposite....

4. I'm literally a heart broken person nje currently (via a relationship), heartbreaks suck yoh!! Being heart-sore is not child's play...so I must do SOMETHING about 1,2,3 because I can't live with this heartache forever....hard to ignore

What bothers a Young Lady in her early 20's currently studying and pursuing philanthropy

My heart aches, I cry @ times when I meet these insane homeless YOUNG stars. Going to register an NPO to just try do something hle Malebo. They don't give me peace.
Young modern women too (hence ycbw).

What bothers a Young Lady

Friends all you have mentioned above is heart breaking, and I think the most we have in common is the lack of education formal/informal.
 
1. What breaks my heart most is the lack of mentor ship from our black sisters and brothers you have made it in different spheres of life, and won't share an hour a week or every blue week to help impart the young ones who are just as eagerly and hungry to make a difference.
 
2. My breaks my heart is when the wealthy "tenderprenues" throw lavish parties, inviting bo Rick Ross and Beyonce's to perform for them and top the event by "making it rain with R100 notes" to the less fortunate, after charging them tickets for their "birthday celebration"???
 
3. What breaks my heart is the great gap in education between the Model c schools and township schools, how the model c schools always in need of upgrades when township schools only get "upgrades" once a year, July to be specific and that is a new painted walls and a couple of planted seeds for trees.
 
4. What breaks my heart the most is the capitalization of the Gospel/ Christianity, how preachers sweat in the pulpit and then put a price tag on the "massage" by demanding expensive pledges like 10 people to give R100 000??? How the body of Christ is glued to the 4walls of a building/structure and not "going out, spreading the gospel, making disciples, loving the widowed and orphaned by feeding them instead of judging, condemning and being hypocrites

What bothers a Young Lady in education

I'm bothered by young girls who are busy making babies kodwa bebona ukuthi ikati lilele eziko
 
I'm bothered by a "friend" who won't support my business elok'shini but name drops when they go to the suburbs
 
I'm bothered by women who think it's their right to keep fathers away from their children just because of adult issues.
 
I'm just bothered by my fellow sisters and brothers who assume they don't have to pay for a service and l must just "understand".
 
I'm bothered by parents who subject their young girls to weaves, nail polish and high heels! Especially@nursery school. 

We are a bothered bunch  

 

A community apart

By Malebo Gololo

"An elephant is never burdened by its trunk". These words hit me like a train that has realised that an object has just jumped in front of it.  These are the words that Barbara Bell cites in Lauretta Ngcobo's Prodigal Daughters.  I must say that I have mixed emotions about the overall storyline not disputing or undermining Lauretta’s amazing writing skills.  I, however feel that the stories were not told to their depths, I wish we were given more.  I do understand that the contributors had limited amount of word count to stick to, but stories such as women who were in exile need to be told more. I still feel that a lot is being kept from us, maybe to protect us as the truth can sometimes be to difficult to live by; not that I subscribe to that notion, but it makes for a better denial trip.  I would have also loved to hear more about those women who trained with the MK and what their lives are like in current South Afrika.  Did the negotiations really betray the struggle as Liepello Pheko puts it in her story?

This just goes to show that the struggle has not really come to an end, it has just shifted onto another gear and maybe that is why the very words that hit me had such a huge impact on my heart.  I have been carrying a load on me and this load was starting to burden me.  My grandfather always told me that whatever it is that bothers me, therein lies part of my calling.  I have a burden to see a totally free Afrika, a Afrika that depends on no one but itself to define it.  A Afrika that is not divided, a Afrika that no longer carries the darkness with it but rather is the light of this global village.  A Afrika that shows that it is not only rich in natural resources but in human capital as well.

Image from www.ubunturepublics.org

As a South Afrikan, it breaks my heart to see fellow South Afrikans looking down on our brothers and sisters from all over Afrika;  when it was the very brothers and sisters that opened their gates for South Afrikans to enter during the struggle of our freedom.  It is the very brothers and sisters that were very active in our liberation movements that we so cast away now.  This is how you see that mental slavery is the most potent weapon of all times.  We, the generations that are supposed to be free from those chains have inherited the very shackles that caused the mess we find ourselves in.  So this is my burden, it is my load and I will not lose hope as I work towards a better Afrika, for that which is mine and on me can and must never burden me. Mayibuye iAfrika

I AM WOMAN, the definition of family

Prodigal Daughters by Lauretta Ngcobo

by Nonkululeko Manyika

This book embodies the struggles of women exiled from their country of birth, wives, mothers, daughters, and sisters, women who chose the struggle directly or indirectly. Some were entrenched in the struggle and vowed to fight the oppressive regime whilst others simply married into it.

Many women left their children behind, fresh from giving birth with milk laden breasts; a constant reminder of sacrifice. Crossing borders moving further from your birth home to live as a foreigner in new lands bringing promise or hostility. Some women gave birth to daughters who listened to the fondness of home in the back yard or grey city areas that resembled nothing like sunny Azania. The torture and torments of not belonging because in your likeness you stand alone, through your skin tone, your stature, your sense of upheaval and sheer ignorance of what Afrika means. And all in the longing to come home, was denied access, was patience in hoping that one day you would be reconciled with burial grounds from where you loved ones lay without a word of departure from you. Without you to stay by their bedside as their last breath left, no last “I love you’s” to carry them to their resting place. The difficulty of mourning in solitude as children your birthed look at you with no concept of what a grandmother means. These women who risked their lives and witnessed friends die, and witnessed human carcases mangled by the SANDF bombs. And yet the dream persisted, the warm rays of Azanian sunshine glimmered on their skins with promise that one day you would return as you come to realise that you still remain in these cities with grey skies and concrete walls.  This is how hatred was meted out to those that disagreed and requested that no human be above another, that no human be below another, and that we share Azania as equals.

But yet in unison there was still separation as those of Caucasian descent were still treated to privileges. Because white domination required it. But yet women who share the same struggle as their very same men were raped and treated like lesser human beings because their place was not in the struggle.  Domination took on so many forms and Afrikan women though strong and agile, bore the brunt of it, because oppression is imbibed in so many of us that we expect to see the most obvious when it’s so mangled and twisted it forms the very part of our being. And yet women played an integral role in keeping the family unit, that were she laid her suitcase that would be home, that shack would be home, that hut would be home, that structure not fit for habitation would be home, because home was were her husband was and not the mere structure.

The family unit shall persist as long as there are women that give all of themselves.